Should child benefit/alimony be used to pay for replacing a stolen bicycle?

Questioner

My ex-wife and I have not had the best relationship since our divorce, now more than five years ago. In addition, we both have different ideas about parenting. We have two teenage daughters, the eldest of whom is now 16 years old. Below are relevant agreements we have made for the question. - Distribution 60/40 - I pay child support for living expenses (always on time, just like the indexation) - The oldest is registered with me for tax benefits - We both have parental authority - So I also receive child benefit for the eldest in this case - I will transfer this in its entirety to my ex because we have agreed that she is also primarily responsible for all administrative matters, including financial matters. Now recently the oldest one had her bike stolen. In my opinion, something like that can happen at any time. However, my ex seems to want to punish her (extra) for this or something, because this morning I received the following text message from my ex: Good morning, M. got this bike back then. Now that she's lost it and the insurance has expired, it's no longer my problem. She has to get a new bike herself. Of course you are free to support/help her. Now I strongly disagree with this. First of all, as parents we are financially responsible for her for at least another four or five years. Secondly, we agreed that these kinds of matters would primarily be arranged and paid for by my ex. Sentiment: she will buy her a cat for €850, but she no longer wants to contribute to something essential like a bicycle. I think that we as parents should pay for this and then we can say that we will arrange it for her this time, but that if it is stolen she will have to arrange something herself. This was just the introduction, now the real question. - What is my legal position if I decide to use the child benefit that I receive to buy her a new bicycle? - What is my legal position if I decide to use the child support I pay to buy her a new bike? And of course I will transfer any remaining amount. That is the agreement after all. I look forward to hearing from you.

Lawyer

I would like to emphasize that this is exploratory advice and for specific legal advice in your situation it is best to contact a lawyer or attorney. Firstly, the main rule according to the law (article 82 paragraph 1 of book 1 of the Civil Code) is that parents exercise authority jointly and that as such they have the duty and the right to care for and raise the minor. This also includes the costs of care and upbringing. This means that you as a parent have an obligation to contribute to the costs of your children. In principle, child support and child allowance should contribute to the costs of care and upbringing of the child. This includes things like food, clothing, school fees, but also other costs such as a bicycle. In that respect, there is no obstacle to using child support or child allowance to finance a new bicycle for your daughter. It is important that the agreements you made with your ex-wife are adhered to. You have indicated that you will transfer the child benefit in its entirety to your ex because you have agreed that she is primarily responsible for all administrative and financial matters. If you change this by first using the child benefit for the bicycle, you are deviating from this agreement. It is advisable to make clear agreements about this with your ex-wife to prevent potential conflicts in the future. As for child support, it would in principle be possible to allocate it to the purchase of a new bicycle, since it is intended for the costs of the care and upbringing of your daughter. However, because you indicate that the remainder will be transferred, this implies a reduction of child support. This is only possible if there are changed circumstances and if you make agreements with your ex-wife, otherwise a judge must allow the change. It is absolutely preferable to continue to discuss this with your ex-partner and to try to reach mutual agreements that are in the best interest of your daughter. However, if this conversation remains difficult, you may consider involving a mediator or a lawyer who can help you find a solution. I hope this gives you a general idea of ​​the legal situation. For specific legal advice, I would again recommend that you contact a more specialized lawyer or attorney.' ---------------- Stichting Rechtswinkel.nl is a national organization with students and volunteers. The above advice is based on limited information and may be incomplete or even incorrect for your situation. Always consult a lawyer or attorney for your further steps. Read disclaimer: https://rechtswinkel.nl/disclaimer I would like to invite you to rate the above answer so that we can learn from your response.