Changes to dog visiting arrangements?

Questioner

In 2016 I got divorced and took care of the dog I shared with my partner at the time. We made an agreement that my ex would have the dog under his care for 3 days every 2 weeks. This went well for a while, but due to my ex's irregular job, it often happened that he had to cancel his appointment. Often several times in a row, which meant that my ex sometimes didn't see the dog for months. The dog is old and is starting to show health problems, where regularity in the dog's life is important. My ex cannot give him that regularity, but he still wants to be able to come and pick up the dog for a few days. Whenever it suits him. The dog has not been with my ex for the past 40 weeks and he has shown little to no interest in the dog. No visits to walk him or see him for example. I want to get rid of this appointment in the interest of the dog so that I can give him the care and rest that he desperately needs. I no longer want the dog to go to my ex. The dog is chipped and registered with the NDG under my name and address. Is a possible registration of the dog with the 'board of directors' for pedigree dogs (under its name) still important? How can I ensure that the dog will always stay with me from now on and will no longer have to go to my ex. I have already tried talking and trying to work it out together, but that does not help. I'm at my wits end.

Lawyer

How was the agreement made between you both at the time? Was this recorded in a deed? Or did you agree on it together verbally or in writing, for example? This can make a difference for the question and any possible follow-up steps. In principle, an agreement made years ago does not necessarily have to continue forever under all circumstances. Circumstances can change, people can move and the interests of the dog can also play a role in this. In this case, it is also the case that your ex did not take the agreements very seriously. Based on the story, it seems that your ex 'uses' the agreement when it suits him. Depending on how the agreement was made, in extreme cases the court could be asked to change/terminate the contact arrangement. In this case I would need some more information before I can give better advice. You can contact me through my profile or via mail@uygulvandam.nl.

Questioner

Hello Dennis, Thanks for your response. The agreements were certainly not recorded in a deed but by email. However, there is no question of a full-throated agreement on my part. My ex had so many demands for the contact arrangement that I could not agree to them. I made counter-demands, and so we emailed back and forth 3 or 4 times. The circumstances have certainly changed. The dog (12 year old Labrador) is 5 years older than during the divorce and now also has health problems. Indeed, my ex only keeps the agreements made when it suits him. As mentioned, he has not seen the dog for more than 40 weeks. I keep him informed about the dog's health and the vet visits. He does not share in the costs, even though this is one of his own demands. He shows no interest and doesn't even ask how the dog is doing now that he knows the dog's health is deteriorating. As you so beautifully put it, my ex uses the appointments, when and as it suits him. The dog seems to him nothing more than an accessory. I would like to get rid of the arrangement. First of all for the sake of the dog's health, and secondly because it only imposes obligations on me and it is without obligation. What do you recommend in this matter? How do I best approach this? I look forward to hearing from you. Thanks in advance.