Sister responsible for banking affairs of demented mother?

Questioner

My single mother's banking is handled by my sister, who (I think) also has authorization. My sister has a history of overspending and debts. At the moment she is doing well, partly because of her current husband. I don't have a problem with her doing the shopping and eating fish with her husband and my mother or sitting on the terrace (mother pays), but I don't think it's necessary to spend money on her (great)grandchildren. I said something about it and got the response: 'I don't understand where this comes from'. Mother had indicated this herself. Mother is demented and I don't believe that. I also indicated that and I was suddenly proven right. And that certainly does not do my confidence in the situation any good. How can I get her to be accountable to me, for example as a supervisor, without too much hassle?

Lawyer

It is important to approach the conversation with your sister in a respectful manner and explain why you are concerned. Indicate that you are concerned about your mother's financial situation and that you feel that you are not being kept informed enough. Ask if she would be willing to keep you informed on a regular basis about the expenses she is making on behalf of your mother. If your sister is unwilling to be accountable, you may consider taking legal action. For example, you could petition the court to appoint a guardian to oversee your mother’s financial affairs. However, this can be a drastic step and may cause family tensions. It is important to remember that your mother's well-being comes first and that it is important to keep a close eye on her financial situation. Therefore, try to have a constructive conversation with your sister and come to a solution that is acceptable to all parties.