What rights do I have with regard to changing the mileage of a parenting plan?

Questioner

In the parenting plan (co-parenting) with my ex-husband we adopted the general km distance of 20 km. We parted as very good friends. (In retrospect it was not entirely fair.) I left everything behind me from my hometown 15 years ago and moved in with my ex in another city. Now he is stopping me from moving.. But except for the children I have nothing in the village where we live. I don't feel happy here! I gave up my house and am now living in a small rented apartment (children share a small room where only a bunk bed fits), so that the children at least had some stability (their own room). I had to find a job on the side, give up my studio (in the garden) because I had to start paying rent to him. And because of the corona I could no longer pay this, he did not want to accommodate me in this. And because I had so-called profit from the divorce, he pressured me to help pay to put the mortgage in his name. In addition, he only had a contribution of €55 for the mediator and I had to pay the other costs! He pays minimal child support and no spousal support. I want to continue with my life and am limited in this. I would like to live with my children (in the future) at my boyfriend's. However, this is 48 km. In terms of distance, co-parenting is feasible. But then on different days. The schedule is now as follows: Monday, Tuesday, Friday and Saturday at my place. Wednesday, Thursday and Sunday at my ex's. We did this because of my ex's work. On Thursday they are at grandpa and grandma's (parents of my ex) after school. He sees them for 1 to 1.5 hours and then they go to bed. He has Wednesday and Sunday off. On the days they are with me, I only work during school hours. My ex is being difficult, he really wants the children in the village to stay in school, but this is not feasible. He simply says that my boyfriend should just move this way. While my boyfriend just bought a really nice house last year, with enough space for the four of us. There is work and family and friends there. And for me this is also much closer to my family. His friends are now also my friends. My children and I feel comfortable there. I really want the children to see their daddy often enough and vice versa. That's why I want to find a good solution. For example, during the week at my place, weekends at dad's. During holidays, for example, extra days. This will also give more peace for the children. Because now there is a lot of dragging back and forth. The eldest one in particular is very sensitive and I think this will be better for her. I would like to know how this works legally. What options are available. What rights do I have? Etc. Can you help me with this? I look forward to hearing from you.

Lawyer

The starting point is that parents try to reach an agreement by mutual agreement. If parents cannot agree on the relocation of the children, they can submit this dispute to the court. Substitute permission for the relocation is then requested from the court on the basis of article 1:253a BW. The interest of the child is the starting point for the judge's assessment. In the weighing of interests, a number of circumstances are taken into account, which have been determined by the Supreme Court, namely: the need to move; the extent to which the move has been thought through and prepared; the alternatives and measures offered by the relocating parent to mitigate and/or compensate for the consequences of the move for the children and the other parent; the extent to which parents are able to communicate and consult with each other; If you would like more information about this, you can always contact me directly.